Grocery Shopping in the Midwest Is Never Just a Quick Trip
Why Grocery Shopping in the Midwest Is Never Just a Quick Trip
(Or a cheap one)
On paper, it sounds manageable. Run in, grab a few things, spend a normal human amount of money, go home. But in the Midwest this is a very sweet thing to believe about yourself. Please hold onto that innocence as long as you can.
I Had a List and a Budget
I walked in with both. A list on my phone and a number in my head, a real, firm, this-is-what-I'm-spending number. I was responsible. I was focused. I was, looking back, completely unprepared for what was about to happen to my bank account.
The People Don't Help
Here's the first trap: someone you know is always there. Your neighbor, your coworker, even that guy from church whose name you've forgotten but you've been too deep in the relationship to ask again. You stop to chat, which is great, and also means you're now standing in the snack aisle for twelve minutes instead of walking past it with purpose. These days the snack aisle is not a place you want to linger when everything costs what it costs right now.
The Cart Has No Concept of Money
I don't know who's in charge of my arms when I shop, but it is not me and it is not my budget. New product with an interesting label? In the cart. Fancy version of something I normally buy the cheap version of? Cart. Item that's "only" four dollars but I grab six of them? You see where this is going. The list was supposed to be guardrails.
That Can't Be Right
At some point the cashier says the total out loud and your brain just... doesn't accept it. That can't be right. I bought groceries. Normal groceries. I didn't accidentally purchase a small boat.
It's a Midwest thing
Grocery shopping in the Midwest isn't about speed, and it's certainly not about spending less than you planned. It's about community, routine, and slowly accepting that a "quick trip" is going to cost you forty-five minutes and $89 more than you intended.
You still get what you came for and some things you didn't. Plus you got to talk to what's-his-name from church. In the end it all seems worth it.