Up until now, Gilbert, Minnesota was a quiet, lovely little town in the beautiful Iron Range area of Minnesota, known chiefly as the home of the first Off-Highway Vehicle (OHV) park in the state. But that has all changed, as they have been invaded by a flock of unruly drunks.

These wasted winged warblers are smashing into windows, cruising into cars, weaving tipsily down the city streets, and some residents are concerned. But after numerous reports came into the police department, a hilarious public notice regarding the inebriated intruders was put up on the department's Facebook page.

It explained that due to an early freeze, berries in the area fermented earlier than normal and birds like robins and cedar waxwings who gorge themselves on the fruit are becoming intoxicated. The younger the bird, the higher the level of boozy behavior. But the befuddled feathered creatures will sober up quickly.

This hasn't always been the case though. In 2014 in the Yukon capital city of Whitehorse, Canadian Animal Health had to set up a "drunk tank" of sorts for the soused songbirds, so they could dry out safely.

The Gilbert Police department wants people to know that they need not call unless they see any of the following behaviors:

  • Heckle and Jeckle walking around being boisterous or playing practical jokes
  • Woodstock pushing Snoopy off the doghouse for no apparent reason
  • The Roadrunner jumping in and out of traffic on Main Street
  • Big Bird operating a motor vehicle in an unsafe manner
  • Angry Birds laughing and giggling uncontrollably and appearing to be happy
  • Tweety acting as if 10 feet tall and getting into confrontations with cats
  • Any other birds after midnight with Taco Bell items

I'm not sure if the Gilbert PD has a Twitter account but this is definitely something to "tweet" about. If you know what I mean. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge!

Bravo Gilbert! Bravo.

Sources: NPR, USA Today, Gilbert, Minnesota tourism


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