Something That Needs to Stop: Complaining About Baggy Pants [VIDEO PHOTOS]
Really? This is still something that people complain about? Really?
Oh wait I’m sorry. Are you a victim of some crazy time explosion that bounced you here from 1992? If so, let me be the first to say that yes, we know about the coffee shops. They are everywhere, yes. Oh and hey, nice Doc Martens. Anyways, Mr. Time refugee, you can complain about baggy pants. To you it’s still a fresh phenomenon, like the Humpty Dance. (It's your chance to do the Hump)
Or maybe you are an open-mike standup comic and you need to break up your “The ladies sure do go to the bathroom together a lot” jokes with something you think the kids will relate to. You’re not funny, but you are excused.
Everybody else let’s just go ahead and knock it off.
Pants have been sagging for at least 20 years. There are people who are grandparents today who wore their pants in that ridiculous style. It’s like being mad at bell bottoms. Complaining about pants is like complaining about Pogs or Ren and Stimpy.
“These kids today with their Hula-Hoops and Trapper Keepers and Clarissa explaining it all!”
Oh don’t get me wrong, it’s a stupid, stupid style. If you are still sagging, get a belt. If you really want to look like your parents yearbook grow out your bangs, roll your jeans and crank up that Roxette cassingle.
Why don’t we complain about something else, maybe from this century? Maybe MySpace or the Da Vinci Code. Oh hey! Have you seen these phones with cameras in them?
If you just have to complain about a pant how about Zubaz?
“Animal prints on your legs, animal prints on your legs, walkin’ ‘round with animal prints on your pants.”
Not catchy I admit, but I still see a viral hit in the making.
Here’s a compromise. If it has to be leg related clothing why don’t we direct our ire towards leg warmers? Those vest leftovers are trying to make a comeback and we cannot stand for it!
And If you are a time refugee from ’92, you might want to stop by the mall. You need to blend in untill the future scientists can rip space/time and get you back to the land of flannel.
Your Hyporcolorshirt really sticks out.