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People Who Will Open the Door Today

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Today you kids will be going door-to-door asking random people for Halloween candy, and you’re going to find many different types of people opening their doors. Each door you walk up to will be opened by one of these people:

  • The elderly widow. She’ll seem a little confused and will offer a Werther’s Original hard candy.
  • Recently-divorced middle-aged man. He’ll be surprised that it’s Halloween and will offer the only thing he has – salt and ketchup packets from fast food places.
  • Grounded teenager. The punk kid will open the door because his evil mother told him to.
  • The cool dad. He’ll try to impress you with some cool slang.
  • The overly-intense guy. He’s a little too into Halloween and will scare your kids away before he even has a chance to offer any candy.
  • The health freak. She’ll give you fruit and a granola bar.
  • Martha Stewart wannabe. She took the time to make adorable little candy treats when all you really want from her is a Butterfinger.
  • The grouch. He’ll open the door only to tell you that he won’t be giving anyone any candy, so stop ringing my bell!
  • The unattended bowl. This is great, but only if you’re the first group of trick-or-treaters there.

(CollegeHumor)

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