It's hard to believe that it's been over a decade since Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise split. There are rumors -- if you believe Vanity Fair -- that Kidman was ushered out of Cruise's life in 2001 by Scientology superiors who considered her a "suppressive person."

But now Kidman, who once said that she still loved her unhinged ex even after their divorce, has risked the wrath of his so-called religion by going on the record with her memories of life as Mrs. Tom Cruise.

(Nice knowing you, Nicole.)

"It was like, 'I'm here and I'm clutching onto your arm, and it all feels a little overwhelming and really strange,'" the statuesque Oscar winner told Harper's Bazaar about red carpet appearances with the munchkin-sized Cruise. "And I was shy. Deeply shy. I didn't feel comfortable at all. But I felt very comfortable at home."

On the flip side, her second marriage to country singer and fellow Aussie Keith Urban had the exact opposite effect on her. "He just gave me confidence," she said about her well-coiffed baby daddy. "Through just being very kind to me and understanding me, opening me up to trying things, my sexuality, those sorts of things."

And now we know what has long been suspected: Keith Urban is better in the sack than Tom Cruise. Quelle surprise.

Still, Nic didn't grab popcorn and a ringside seat during Cruise's incredibly public split with Katie Holmes, and even though she was perfectly entitled to yell KARMA, BITCHES!, she found no joy in their breakup. In fact, it was barely a blip on her radar.

"I'm not caught up in any of it," she said. "It's not really a part of my life."