This coming Father's Day will mark my fifth one as a dad. The more years that I live as a dad, the more my wish for something on Father's Day grows.

First I think how it was the first year I was a dad when Father's came around. It was a whole new feeling.

It was Father's Day and I was really a dad. It was hard to imagine that it was real, but it felt good.

After coming to realization with it, I just sat back and enjoyed it. But then things started weighing in on my mind.

I started thinking about my dad and how I wished he were still alive. And how I would handle Father's Day with him way different than I did in the past.

The gifts would be a small part of it. Instead I would sit down and tell him how many memories I have of the nights playing catch in the back yard and what it meant to me.

I would talk of the times we went fishing and how he let me use his tools when I was a little boy. And all the times we went to the races together and the one time he took me to a movie and mom stayed home. It was a boy's night like nothing I could ever have with any buddies.

I would like to tell him about the one of a kind feeling I got when I saw him coming up the street in his car. Times like when I was watching and waiting for him to come home from work or for him to pick me up from Sunday school.

These are some of the many things I would make sure he knew I was grateful for. And I would cap it off by telling him that now that I have a son of my own, my main hope is that I can be as good of a dad as he was.

My wish is that I could spend the day with my dad knowing that is not possible. But what is possible, is to try to be him in every way I can. And in doing that, I feel that he and I did spend the day together.