10 Heinous Heads of Celebrity Hair
Most celebrities have glam squads kept on retainer to advise and style everything from hair to clothes to makeup. Unfortunately, though, sometimes the image entourage takes a nap and things fall through the cracks -- or, worse yet, the stars try to handle things themselves and flame out in spectacular fashion.
Hair in particular seems to present a unique challenge, so it wasn't hard for us to find a whole slew of follicle-related fails. Some are one-off disasters from red carpet appearances, while others are semi-tragic cuts, bad colors, poorly done extensions or horrific perms -- but they're all worthy of being pointed and laughed at.
Mullets are never fashionable, even when they're supposed to be ironic. Or, as in this case, worn by beauties like Scarlett Johansson. The gorgeous actress has the most voluptuous, pillowy pucker since Angelina Jolie, yet we can't even admire her pout since her flaxen Carol Brady mullet is drawing all our attention. It's too choppy and too heavy on the bangs. Ug to the ly.
Here's another case of a pretty ingenue with a really bad idea. Teen queen Miley Cyrus lopped off her long lush locks and had them fashioned into this platinum punky buzz-cut that's long on top and shaved underneath. The style looks great on an edgy pop star like Pink, but it doesn't give Miley cred -- nor does it make her look cool.
Jennifer Aniston is more famous for her hair (and failed marriage to Brad Pitt) than she is for her acting roles, and this was a rare misstep for the Friend. She chopped her damaged long locks into a chin length bob that she hated almost immediately, and even as it grew out, this limp "lob" style didn't show off her hair's natural shine and body. Meh.
Anne Hathaway is classically beautiful in a swan-like, Audrey Hepburn sort of way. But since she wants to be known for her acting skills instead of her looks, she did the Oscar-friendly thing and hacked off her hair for a role in the big screen adaptation of 'Les Miserables.' The pixie is shapeless and dull and while we can appreciate that she endured an ugly cut for her art, this look is about as "miserables" as it gets.
Normally we wouldn't speak ill of the dead, but while we absolutely loved Amy Winehouse's neo-jukebox voice and her bluesy soul, we did not love her hair. She often teased her black locks into a massive bouffant in an attempt to be edgy and retro-modern, but instead it ended up looking like a cross between a beehive and a rat's nest -- a hair hybrid to which no one should aspire. She often tucked cute accessories (like flowers or a plastic heart boasting her husband's name) into the wreck, but that didn't make the big knotted mess any better.
This was not BritBrit's finest moment, to say the least. When she performed at the 2007 VMAs, she looked out of shape, out of sorts, out of sync and out of her mind in an ill-fitting black bikini -- but even worse than her sloppy dance moves was the fact that her poorly-woven blonde extensions (a fall-out of her self-imposed buzz-cut) were clearly visible. You could see the weave at the roots -- a big no-no when wearing artificial hair -- and overall the whole thing was a nightmare fit for a Tim Burton movie.
It's a bird! It's a plane! It's Dee Snider! No, wait ... it's a drag queen! Wrong again -- it's actually Christina Aguilera. During the early '00s, Xtina had not yet adopted her modernized Marilyn Monroe look of crimson lips and platinum locks, and during her 'Dirrty' girl phase she looked like she stuffed her finger in a light socket and wound up with this mess as a result. Not only was it massive and overpowering to her then-tiny frame, it made her seem as though she'd just quit her job as a carney.
Keri Russell's wild curls were signature to her title role on 'Felicity,' so it's no wonder the show's ratings plummeted when she chopped them off. We hope the person who told her to do this -- or just didn't have the cajones to advise against it -- was run out of Hollywood on a rail, because Russell's hair texture and volume just weren't suited for it. Curly manes do not look flattering when worn this tight and so close to the head, and the overall change was simply too jarring. She looks like a soccer mom who gave herself a home perm and then got into a fight with a Flowbee.
Donald Trump is like a gazillionaire, so you'd think he'd fork over some of that paper for a quality cut -- or at least hire an experienced stylist to make sure his hair actually flatters him. Instead, he rocks a ridiculous comb-over and isn't fooling anyone. We don't know how The Donald walks past a mirror and isn't ashamed of himself (for this and so many other things).
There are no words, but we'll try anyway. We know being a reality TV star and a mother of eight is hard work, but this isn't just hair that's been ignored -- this stripey asymmetrical bob with a spiked crown was intentional. When your 'do is a popular Halloween costume at the height of your fame, that's not exactly an accolade or a compliment -- so Kate earns our title for the ugliest and most unflattering hairstyle in the history of (wo)man.